Fruit of the Eyes

I was thinking this morning..... or rather talking this morning to men. When you look at your wife, in the form of what fruit do you see her? There is a common Nigerian saying that 'if you want to see the red eyes of a man, touch his wife.' I confirmed this early in life when I was living with an aunt and the husband. Great family with so much love and mutual respect between them. One evening, we were in the living room when my aunt returned from her outing with swollen face like I had never seen her with before. She walked straight into the bedroom crying. We all rushed after her asking what was wrong. Amidst sobs, she revealed that a taxi driver had slapped her because she challenged his wrong doing. Of course she didn't let him off the hook that easy but after much pleading from people around, she had to let him go. As soon as she mentioned that a taxi driver had slapped her, what I saw in the eyes of the husband was something I had scarcely seen. He sprang up, with fire in his eyes and headed out the room asking where the man can be found. He was itching to go out there and beat up and arrest any taxi driver within reach. It took a lot of persuasion from my aunt to calm him down. From that day, I never doubted the saying that if you want to see the red eyes of a man, touch his wife.

From the depth of my immaturity, I wondered why my uncle's eyes were red that evening. Years later after I got married, I understood why. It was simply because his wife was 'the apple of his eyes.' Not green apple, I mean succulent red apple. Red apple is not only pleasant to look upon, it is also very tasteful. I found out that the phrase 'apple of one's eye' which first was used in the Bible, comes from a Hebrew expression that literally means 'little man of the eye,' and it refers to the tiny reflection of yourself that you can see in other people’s pupils. It means to gaze on and be fond of that person. 

I was still musing on this when a colleague told me that this Covid-19 induced lockdown has resulted in increased domestic violence. 'Ibabo!' Exclaiming like an urhobo man, I wondered why a man will beat his wife. I imagined what the eyes of these wife beaters will be like. Will they be red as well? If they are red, they are definitely not the red of an apple. A man will never lay his hands on 'the apple of his eyes.' Since a man must find his wife distasteful to beat her, one can reasonably conclude that to a wife beater, his wife is 'the cranberry of his eyes.' Cranberry is a tart, bitter red berry.

What about a man that neither loves or hates his wife? Such a man can be in the same house with his wife for weeks but give her no pleasure. He presents her to the world as lovely but indifferent to her at home. You can't say she is the apple of his eyes neither is she the cranberry, rather a pomologist (an expert in fruits) will say she is 'the pitaya of his eyes.' Dragon fruit, otherwise known as pitaya, is hands-down, one of the best-looking fruits on the planet. But when it comes to taste, it is mild to the point of utter tastelessness; as bland as bland gets. 

The way men see their wives vary from one man to another depending on their upbringing and 'wetin dey worry dem.' From the perspective of the fruit of their eyes, some women are garlic, others are 'agbalumo (udara),' and some bitter kola. Whatever it is, I see this period of the lockdown as an opportunity for men to recultivate their gardens. If your wife was either the cranberry, pitaya or even bitter kola of your eyes, it's time to make the change and make her the apple or mango of your eyes. To the ladies, should your husband treat you like you are bitter like cranberry or tasteless like pitaya, worry not, God has got you covered because you are the apple of His eyes (Psalms 17:8). 

Happy Sunday.

......Just the thoughts of a certain Wey Mey